This week has been totally mad already. Yes I'm getting ready to leave the UK but before that the long weekend for me was dominated by shopping, which left me totally exhausted.
I realise I bring a lot of this on myself - I am a very picky shopper, so it takes a long time to get what I want. Take Monday for example - I walked half the length of Kilburn High Road (i.e. from the Jubilee to Bakerloo line stations on that road) to get the right coloured pair of shoelaces for some shoes I'd bought the day before.
On the Saturday before that I was on Oxford Street. I've put a bit of thought into it and I can't think of a busier shopping street in the world. It was a long weekend so there were plenty of tourists in town, and it was fantastic weather, so they were all out and about enjoying the sunshine (or, as it's called in London, I Can't Believe It's Not Miserable).
Knowing I was picky, that I had dinner plans, and that I had a few different things to buy, I was in a hurry. The shopping list included: walking shoes that were dark brown adidas with light brown stripes and light brown shoelaces; a dark green hoodie - not khaki or bottle but a rich forest green, plain with no lettering or pattern; possibly a v-neck jumper that goes well with my jeans; new jeans, quite dark in colour and reasonably priced; a cotton shirt with natural colours and a repetitive pattern that had a high and firm collar [not quite 70's style], and that I could get away with wearing with either shorts or jeans; a book that had kakuro, sudoku and killer sudoku in it, just killer and kakuro might do at a pinch if they were hard enough; a good basic-to-intermediate French workbook that had a bit on sentence construction, not just pictures and nouns; sunglasses that were cheap but not cheap-looking, would be durable and suited my face; cricket whites from Lilywhites, not quite as cheap-and-nasty as last years', some toiletries and a few other bits and pieces.
Queer-eye, anyone?
Anyways, then add to that my intense dislike - OK, let's call it hatred - of people who are either slow, walk in groups six or seven across thereby blocking overtaking, don't know where they're going, don't care, don't walk in straight lines, stop bang in the middle of footpaths to read maps or try and pick up a dropped penny, or all of the above. Honestly if I was in a car it'd be road rage, but like all road rage, it'd be entirely justified. Violence and all.
Tourists (myself included) are the worst of these offenders. So it was obviously great to see them all out on Saturday.
So I was in a rush, had heaps to buy, I'm a picky shopper, and hate slow and inconsiderate pedestrians, and was on the busiest shopping street in the world. Oh yeah, also it was a bit humid on Saturday arvo - definitely enough to be uncomfortable.
Now add to that the fact that I'm a ranga. Nuff said?
No, as it turns out.
I went from shop to shop looking for things, rarely satisfied. For example I started at the Adidas store near Bond St. They had a few styles I liked but nothing in my colour. They had another store near Covent Garden (nearer to Cambridge Circus it turns out, but whatever). So I tubed it there, but decided to walk back to Tottenham Court Road to see if there was anything along there. No there wasn't. I walked the length of Oxford Street to Bond Street, checking out most stores on the way. By then I'd forgot some of the earlier stores so I went back there to be reminded that they didn't have anything that met my fairly specific tastes.
There was one thing I liked in this trip - a shirt I got in Debenham's. I went to purchase the shirt and found my card declined. Tried it again. Declined. I paid in cash in the end, but that sorta ruined my budgeting system which relies on me taking out a week's expenditure at once and touching my bank account as little as possible. This was all to come out of my bank account though.
By now furious, I called the bank. Seems they've noticed I use internet banking and have sent me a new card, immediately cancelling this one. Thing is, they didn't f*cking well tell me. So I was stuck without access to my main account for the entire bank holiday weekend (anyone spot the irony there?). I sorted this out eventually, on the phone, but I'm still awaiting my promised apology. To be fair the bloke who spoke with me was very nice. But at the time it did very little to quell my rage.
So, having walked the route twice, for good measure I did it again. Three times along Oxford Street.
I found some jeans. Big whoop. By then I was running late for dinner with a mate and pretty stressed out. Infact with all the stress over bank accounts, high-but-not-70's-high collars, kakuro, irresponsible pedestrians and adidas, it won't surprise you to hear that I was totally exhausted by the end of the day - mentally and physically.
I think you'll agree that we're all lucky there was no mass killing spree on Oxford Street last weekend.
I got to dinner eventually (luckily we had a few drinks first to loosen me up a bit - they always seem to help).
Of course, being a glutton for punishment I did it all again on Sunday, only adding Lilywhites into the deal (where I got shoes - Nike not Adidas, which are too narrow for my feet; and the shoelaces were the wrong colour). For the uninitiated, Lilywhites is rivalled only by Macao in population density, except the vast majority of customers are Chavs.
Even then, I wasn't done though. I ended up walking a fair way to get the right pair of laces, as mentioned above. Even then I'm not totally happy with the laces. They're a bit too long. That's actually been niggling me a bit since I got them.
Ah well. You can't win 'em all I guess. What was it Tyler Durden said in Fight Club? "I say: 'Let me never be complete'"
I realise I bring a lot of this on myself - I am a very picky shopper, so it takes a long time to get what I want. Take Monday for example - I walked half the length of Kilburn High Road (i.e. from the Jubilee to Bakerloo line stations on that road) to get the right coloured pair of shoelaces for some shoes I'd bought the day before.
On the Saturday before that I was on Oxford Street. I've put a bit of thought into it and I can't think of a busier shopping street in the world. It was a long weekend so there were plenty of tourists in town, and it was fantastic weather, so they were all out and about enjoying the sunshine (or, as it's called in London, I Can't Believe It's Not Miserable).
Knowing I was picky, that I had dinner plans, and that I had a few different things to buy, I was in a hurry. The shopping list included: walking shoes that were dark brown adidas with light brown stripes and light brown shoelaces; a dark green hoodie - not khaki or bottle but a rich forest green, plain with no lettering or pattern; possibly a v-neck jumper that goes well with my jeans; new jeans, quite dark in colour and reasonably priced; a cotton shirt with natural colours and a repetitive pattern that had a high and firm collar [not quite 70's style], and that I could get away with wearing with either shorts or jeans; a book that had kakuro, sudoku and killer sudoku in it, just killer and kakuro might do at a pinch if they were hard enough; a good basic-to-intermediate French workbook that had a bit on sentence construction, not just pictures and nouns; sunglasses that were cheap but not cheap-looking, would be durable and suited my face; cricket whites from Lilywhites, not quite as cheap-and-nasty as last years', some toiletries and a few other bits and pieces.
Queer-eye, anyone?
Anyways, then add to that my intense dislike - OK, let's call it hatred - of people who are either slow, walk in groups six or seven across thereby blocking overtaking, don't know where they're going, don't care, don't walk in straight lines, stop bang in the middle of footpaths to read maps or try and pick up a dropped penny, or all of the above. Honestly if I was in a car it'd be road rage, but like all road rage, it'd be entirely justified. Violence and all.
Tourists (myself included) are the worst of these offenders. So it was obviously great to see them all out on Saturday.
So I was in a rush, had heaps to buy, I'm a picky shopper, and hate slow and inconsiderate pedestrians, and was on the busiest shopping street in the world. Oh yeah, also it was a bit humid on Saturday arvo - definitely enough to be uncomfortable.
Now add to that the fact that I'm a ranga. Nuff said?
No, as it turns out.
I went from shop to shop looking for things, rarely satisfied. For example I started at the Adidas store near Bond St. They had a few styles I liked but nothing in my colour. They had another store near Covent Garden (nearer to Cambridge Circus it turns out, but whatever). So I tubed it there, but decided to walk back to Tottenham Court Road to see if there was anything along there. No there wasn't. I walked the length of Oxford Street to Bond Street, checking out most stores on the way. By then I'd forgot some of the earlier stores so I went back there to be reminded that they didn't have anything that met my fairly specific tastes.
There was one thing I liked in this trip - a shirt I got in Debenham's. I went to purchase the shirt and found my card declined. Tried it again. Declined. I paid in cash in the end, but that sorta ruined my budgeting system which relies on me taking out a week's expenditure at once and touching my bank account as little as possible. This was all to come out of my bank account though.
By now furious, I called the bank. Seems they've noticed I use internet banking and have sent me a new card, immediately cancelling this one. Thing is, they didn't f*cking well tell me. So I was stuck without access to my main account for the entire bank holiday weekend (anyone spot the irony there?). I sorted this out eventually, on the phone, but I'm still awaiting my promised apology. To be fair the bloke who spoke with me was very nice. But at the time it did very little to quell my rage.
So, having walked the route twice, for good measure I did it again. Three times along Oxford Street.
I found some jeans. Big whoop. By then I was running late for dinner with a mate and pretty stressed out. Infact with all the stress over bank accounts, high-but-not-70's-high collars, kakuro, irresponsible pedestrians and adidas, it won't surprise you to hear that I was totally exhausted by the end of the day - mentally and physically.
I think you'll agree that we're all lucky there was no mass killing spree on Oxford Street last weekend.
I got to dinner eventually (luckily we had a few drinks first to loosen me up a bit - they always seem to help).
Of course, being a glutton for punishment I did it all again on Sunday, only adding Lilywhites into the deal (where I got shoes - Nike not Adidas, which are too narrow for my feet; and the shoelaces were the wrong colour). For the uninitiated, Lilywhites is rivalled only by Macao in population density, except the vast majority of customers are Chavs.
Even then, I wasn't done though. I ended up walking a fair way to get the right pair of laces, as mentioned above. Even then I'm not totally happy with the laces. They're a bit too long. That's actually been niggling me a bit since I got them.
Ah well. You can't win 'em all I guess. What was it Tyler Durden said in Fight Club? "I say: 'Let me never be complete'"
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