What I Miss About Perth

Last weekend was wonderful - about 22 degrees, bright sunshine, and we managed to play cricket to boot! I might have even got sunburnt. But like so many bouncers that have come my way at closing time, the weather has closed in and summarily -comprehensively - dismissed summer. I awoke on Monday and Tuesday to clear but chilly conditions (about five degrees), and the sun was barely up as I plodded down to my train. Sigh.

With this in mind, and realising I'd have the next nine months indoors alone with my thoughts (a scary prospect), it is surely time to walk that well-worn path by listing thing I miss about home. I am aware that in doing this I am in fear of being called a whingeing pom. Family and friends go without saying obviously, don't get all soppy though. You're not all friends.

Strip Sub Combos

While my penchant for Nando's is well recorded, not much can replace a Strip Sub Combo from Red Rooster. The crusty, deep fried strips of chicken, the cholesterol-laden mayonnaise with mysterious herbs. The token lettuce. The sugar-laden baguette. Phwoar, not bad!

This, of course, could be extended to a few more foods also: choc milk and iced coffee, Vegemite, decent meat pies (rather than the "meat" pies over here).

The Beach

I'm not a huge beach person - I appreciate it more in knowing it's there and that I can head down there any time I want. Over here, that isn't the case, so I still miss it. From my arrival here on May 9, I didn't see the ocean until the end of August (and that was in Iceland). Almost four months.

To be fair I could add open space and real grass to that.

Taking the Weather for Granted

It's entirely feasible to forget the sky is blue here. Sunny weather is always noticed here. It's a bit disappointing: to appreciate every sunny day because you have to. It'd be nice to know that, bar a couple of humid changes, the next 3 months will feature cloudless skies and temperatures in the thirties.

Optimism

I appreciate the irony of including this in a blog entry full of regret for things I've left behind in Oz. But it's one of the most noticeable. People over here get all hyped up, usually over an individual (Beckham, Pietersen, Wilkinson) and heap him with expectation, and follow it up with an overwhelming sigh and immediate pessimism, with comments like "typical England". The press, especially the tabloid press, do this incessantly. But no one - no one - does this more than Nasser Hussain when commentating the cricket. England never stood a chance under him.

But its not just in sport. It seems to pervade every facet of British culture.

English People

No doubt, there are more in WA than there are in London. If you want to meet a pom, don't go to London.

I don't actually miss them, I just wanted to make that point.

Customer Service

This is well known, and nowhere better than in the bureaucracy. Even confusing bureaucratic dead-ends, which obviously frustrate the hell out of members of the public, are explained with apathy as if going through the motions. Honestly I wonder how much thought some people put into dealing with the public. Put yourself in their shoes.

Not restricted to bureaucracy though. The other night I was getting a night bus home. I waited about 30 minutes for it to come along, and my Oyster card didn't work - it was out of credit. I handed the guy the fare and he said I had to get a ticket outside. I pop out to get it and the bus is driving off! I run alongside it for about 50 metres bashing the door. He opens it and says unapologetically, "Its not my job to wait for you"

I walk away and half-under-my-breath said "Fuck off" - at the pathetic comment.

He screamed at me and kicked me off the bus. I waited another 40 minutes, but I was much happier having given him a piece of my mind.

But the one thing I've noticed more than anything is the pathological inability for people that serve you to look you in the eye - even when they're handing you your change. Very, very unfriendly, and more than a little isolating in a big city.

Diction

For the inventors of this fine language, they do a hell of a job bastardising it. It seems everyone wants to substitute glottal stops for every "t", so they are actually silent. In short, people don't know how to pronounce words. I give some of my English mates shit about this when we give each other a ribbing, and that's where the fun ends. They take exception to it - even when they do it themselves. So if you ever want to annoy a pom, that's what you need to do.

I guess writing about missing home means I'm becoming a Whingeing* Pom. Talk about irony.

I'm sure there are heaps more. Any suggestions??

(* I'm not comfortable with that spelling of "whingeing" - never have been - but "whinging" just looks ludicrous)